LEAVING NANCY

A global financial crisis, torrential rain and floods in the UK, the European Football Championships just started and the Olympics soon to begin – it’s all big news, but not quite so big as David Cameron leaving his daughter in a pub.

Opinion on this one seems pretty evenly split between those who say, “Poor bloke – been there, done that myself,” and others who say, “I always knew he was incompetent.” I guess this split reflects personal experience, as well as pre-existent attitudes towards the Prime Minister.

Like the PM I have a daughter called Nancy. (Although mine is older than his, so it definitely wasn’t a case of copying his & Sam’s example in name choosing.) We’ve never left her in a pub, but we did once lock her in the car when we came to church – it was for no more than a couple of minutes, but she’s never quite forgiven us for it! Mrs Hosier claims to have left another of our offspring in the car while she went shopping, thinking that the child was actually attached to her in a baby sling. When she realized the sling was empty her first thought was that the child had somehow slipped out into a freezer compartment at the supermarket, which – thankfully! – was not the case. My own mother tells a story of how she once left me parked in my pram outside the shops (as people still did in the 70’s – it wasn’t all beige and dodgy haircuts back then you know; you could leave a baby lying about and not get reported to social services or be in terror of a paedophile. Happy days!) and then headed for home forgetting my existence, before realizing she was missing something.

So there is nothing particularly unusual in losing a child without realizing you’ve done so – although I do wonder why the Cameron’s security detail didn’t run a more comprehensive headcount. It wouldn’t happen on The West Wing. Of course, the most famous example of this is Mary & Joseph losing Jesus in circumstances not unlike the Cameron’s – “I thought he was with you!” No, I thought he was with you! That situation turned out ok too.

All of which simply goes to show that we should perhaps be more relaxed about our kids than sometimes we are. Chances are they’ll be ok. And in the PM’s further defence, I would like to point out what an exceptionally cool name he chose for his daughter – you just know that anyone called Nancy is going to be able to look after themselves, wherever they get left.